How to become a surrogate mother and what reward you can expect?

Surrogate mothers can be treated differently: someone condemns them, and someone thanks them. But one thing is certain - without such women many children could never be born. In difficult cases of infertility, when a woman cannot bear her child because of the threat to her life, only surrogates can help.

Surrogate motherhood is a type of assisted reproductive technology. There are oocyte donors, and there are sperm donors - they both help the couple to conceive a baby, if there are factors of female or male infertility. There are also surrogate mothers who take care of and bear the baby. According to blood and genetic parameters, it will not be native for her, but for those who will provide their germ cells for IVF - an egg cell and spermatozoa.

The indications for the artificial insemination program with the participation of surrogacy are quite simple and clear - all cases of female infertility, in which there is no possibility of getting pregnant, and also bear the fruit and give birth to it. Both married couples and single men and women who do not have a permanent sexual partner can take advantage of the help of surrogates.

Everything happens as in conventional IVF: the egg is fertilized in vitro or ICSI, and the grown embryos are not transferred to the uterus of the egg owner, but to another woman’s uterus, which has undergone preliminary hormonal stimulation to synchronize the menstrual cycles. If all goes well, then the pregnancy begins. But the baby, who will be harboring a woman under her heart, will not be her family. He will have biological parents - he will be similar to them, from them he will take character traits and hobbies, intellect and even talents.

According to the legislation in force in Russia in 2012, women (gestational couriers) are strictly forbidden to act as egg donors (oocytes) at the same time in order to avoid situations where the courier will bear the child’s own blood. Laws rather strictly regulate relations - a surrogate mother cannot, under any circumstances, claim the rights to the infant she has born. Even in her womb, he is considered the biological child of other people, and it is they who can make with the doctor all the decisions regarding the course of pregnancy and childbirth.

For infertile couples and single parents surrogates - the solution to the problem of infertility. She is an important person who will help realize the long-cherished dream of having children. For the gestational courier, “customers” are a way to improve their financial situation, because any labor must be paid.

There are, of course, countries in which surrogate motherhood is prohibited on the basis of monetary relations, and this is regarded as human trafficking.There it can be allowed only on a voluntary and free basis (for example, in the UK), and in such circumstances only close relatives or friends who genuinely want to help, without demanding anything in return, act as gestational couriers.

In Russia, the state program of support for demographic measures, which includes the program of support for reproductive technologies for couples who have been diagnosed with infertility, does not prohibit the use of gestational couriers on a contractual basis.

You can become a surrogate mother only if the woman fully complies with the requirements of Order No. 107n by the Ministry of Health. These requirements should not be considered exaggerated, even if, at first glance, a similar thought creeps in. On closer examination, it becomes clear why the criteria are exactly like that.

This concept includes the range from 18 to 42-43 years, but for surrogates restrictions are more stringent: the age of a woman at the time of entering into an agreement with future biological parents must be from 20 to 35 years.

It is important that the child was conceived naturally, bred and born as a result of natural childbirth. In this case, a woman can be married, and then the written and notarized consent of her husband for the participation of the spouse in the surrogacy program will be a prerequisite.

The selection of candidates takes place quite carefully. A woman should not have any chronic diseases, pathologies of the reproductive system, mental illnesses and deviations, as well as bad habits. The psychiatrist additionally provides an opinion on the responsibility and adequacy of the candidate (about 15% of those who wish, for example, are eliminated at this stage). The narcologist does not simply check whether the candidate has ever been registered at the dispensary, but also conducts a large number of tests for traces of prohibited and psychotropic substances.

A woman should definitely get access to the program from a geneticist. Despite the fact that its biological material is not used for artificial insemination, which means that DNA is not transferred to the child, the geneticist must be sure that no genetic abnormalities develop. There are cases when surrogacy during pregnancy first manifested schizophrenia and epilepsy.

Candidates for surrogacy must be given not only a certificate of her criminal conviction, even if he has been redeemed, but also a certificate that she does not pass as a suspect in any criminal or administrative case, is not under investigation.

All criteria are important, but the medical commission will be the most “laborious”. We will have to pass a huge number of tests, pass a large number of tests, get written permission to participate in the program from all medical specialists: cardiologist, gynecologist, ophthalmologist, otolaryngologist, dermatologist, venereologist, psychiatrist, narcologist, surgeon, therapist, neurologist.

Most Russian clinics and centers are trying to select for participation in the program only women who have Russian citizenship, as well as owners of Rh positive blood.

In order to get a referral for a survey, A woman should provide the following documents to the agency or clinic with which she plans to cooperate:

• RF passport (copy of all pages);
• SNILS;
• medical insurance policy;
• birth certificate of your child (copy);
• certificate of marriage or divorce (for those who have never been married, you need a certificate from the registry office about the absence of records in acts of civil status).

Of course, you can advertise on the Internet, but this is not the best way out, because not only biological parents, but also the woman herself - the gestation courier should be protected from fraud. Only a reputable agency or clinic can ensure legal accuracy and transparency of the transaction. To find the agency of reproductive labor mediation that is closest to home will not be - there are a lot of official websites of such organizations on the Internet.

For starters, you can limit the filing of the questionnaire on the agency's website. It contains basic data: age, height, weight, presence of children, marital status, reasons for which a woman wants to become a gestational courier. If this information meets the requirements, the woman will be called back and invited to the office with the above documents. Women who do not have children of their own are not considered as candidates, as well as women after cesarean section.

The cost of a medical examination can be paid by both the agency and the woman herself (subject to the guarantee of the return of the money spent at the conclusion of the contract). If all the conclusions of the doctors are in order, the woman is entered into the database of surrogate mothers. As soon as there is a couple or a lonely barren patient who liked this particular surrogate mother, the agency representative is contacted by a woman.

Usually the lawyers of such companies undertake the execution of a contract between a woman and future biological parents. At the request of the latter, an individual can be put in charge, who will act as an intermediary between the surrogacy mother and bioregents if the latter for some reason would like to limit communication with the gestational courier until the birth of the child. Then the pregnancy will proceed with the curator, who, on the instructions of the biological parents, will pay the current expenses of the pregnant woman and closely monitor that the terms of the contract are not violated by either party.

The surrogate mother has the right to rely on the decency and honesty of the biological parents of the baby, on respect for her human dignity. She also has the right to monthly payments: salary, compensation for all expenses related to pregnancy and childbirth.

Gestational courier has the right to ask for an advance: no more than 10-15% of the fee. Also, a woman can ask to rent housing for her during pregnancy in order to keep the fact secret, for example, from her own children.

The gestational courier may very well provide its services for free if it deems it necessary, and also replace the financial fee with another option, for example, by asking to buy her an apartment or a car after the birth of a child. The surrogate mother has the right to demand that her biological parents provide her with everything necessary for a successful infant: with vitamins, qualified medical supervision, and medicines prescribed by the doctor.

Some manage to persuade biological parents to pay for their stay during the carrying of the fetus at the resort, if the attending physician does not object, because the sea air and the sun's rays are useful, first of all, for the unborn child.

A surmama can legally receive maternity benefits at work when she leaves on maternity leave and after giving birth.

Now about what gestational couriers are not entitled to.A woman can not violate the recommendations of the doctor, because it harms the health of the baby, skip the medication, take lightly to the diet and day regimen. She has no right to smoke or drink while carrying another child. It can not violate the legal status of genetic parents, assign the child itself, blackmail the “customers” with an abortion, demanding a change in the terms of the contract.

All conditions must be clearly stated in the contract. In order to protect the interests of surrogates, it is important to introduce a clause that would indicate the order of actions in case something happens to the genetic parents during the pregnancy (death, divorce).

There is no single price for surrogate motherhood - it is not regulated by the state. A couple can not do IVF with the participation of surrogates, paying for its services by means of quotas on IVF. All costs will fall solely on the shoulders of "customers".

The amount of the fee, which you can count on, depends on the region and the standard of living in it, on the competition (the more the Surm’s database the agency has, the less you will be able to earn). Statistics for 2018 shows that the most averaged amount of the fee is the amount in the range of 1.5-2 million rubles. Binding to the region is very significant: in Siberia, for example, surmums rarely receive even 1.5 million (the average cost there is 800 thousand rubles, and in Moscow or St. Petersburg you can earn up to 3 million depending on the specific individual agreement ).

This amount - the fee that is paid after the birth of the child. Biological parents should pay for diagnostics, tests, medicines as needed. Also in Russia there is the practice of a monthly “salary” for a gestational courier: on average, it ranges from 25 to 50 thousand rubles per month.

A woman can count on the first “salary” from the moment of the establishment of the onset of pregnancy. Fees are paid after delivery, even if they come prematurely.

Gestational couriers in the USA are paying most of all - fees there are almost three times higher than Russian ones. In Ukraine and Belarus prices are the lowest - a woman does not receive more than 15 thousand dollars for her services.

When deciding whether to become a surrogate mother, a woman must answer herself honestly to the main question: can she, after 9 months of pregnancy without problems and worries, part with the baby she is already used to.

It is also worth understanding that moral and spiritual problems are possible, because it is not for nothing that surrogate motherhood is blamed and almost all religions in the world are considered immoral, with the exception of Buddhism and Judaism, and even those with great limitations. From their point of view, what happens between the biological parents of the baby and the woman who bore it and gave birth is nothing but the depreciation of eternal values: the inviolability of the family, the mysteries of the birth of life and the happiness of motherhood, as all this becomes the subject of sale .

Before a decisive step, you need to weigh the pros and cons and only then make the final decision. After the conclusion of the contract, it will no longer be possible to change it, or the penalty may amount to such an amount that it will be easier to agree to all the conditions of the second party.

Any breach of agreement and simply spoiled relations with biological parents at any stage can lead to the fact that your name, surname and other data together with a description of claims to you will fall into the so-called “black list”.

There are also “blacklists” of bioregans, but finding the right person in them is quite difficult. Sometimes the surrogame does not even know the contact details of his “customers”, especially if planning and pregnancy proceeds with the curator.Nevertheless, a woman should be ready for fraud: in specialized forums, you can find reviews that biopods underpaid, left, hid with a child. You can also encounter despotic "customers" who, with the help of cameras and bodyguards, will track every step of a pregnant woman, every meeting and every purchase.

How to become a surrogate mother, see the following video.